I choose "the miraculous twist at the end " because, I think we all wait for that and before we make it to that, we live our lives in the middle. When our lives become too much, we hold onto that ending with all our might, and believe as hard as we can that our wonderful, amazing, happily ever after ending is soon coming. The worst part is that we all know that the ending will never come. Not everyone is going to die in an amazing duel for the love of their lives. There simply aren't enought soulmates out there. Very few people die in a flourish of anything. Certainly a few people may die fighting for their country, or their true love and soul mate, but many more die alone, on a street corner in the cold, or in a bed in a home, their own true love gone many years before and they may not even remember their true loves, or their own name. Many die without a flourish, or a fireworks show, alone, with only the greatest mystery of all time awaiting them.
Do we create these amazing scenarios in our head to compensate for the fact that we really are afraid of what there is ahead of us? Nobody knows for sure what awaits us after death. That is the one constant of us all, that is what binds us together. Some people will have ideas about it. Some people will have beliefs about it. Some people will have true convictions about it, and be willing to kill because of those convictions. Kill for that unknown.
Do we simply create spectacular deaths in movies and in our minds as a way of looking forward to that one true constant?
I'm beginning to wonder why people fear death. It make as much sense to fear death as it does to fear gravity. It will happen, and there is nothing you can do to stop it. Sure you don't know when it's going to happen, but you don't know as a baby whether you're going to fall on your ass today or not. You may never even know how you go, but it will happen, and you will go, so get over it, and enjoy the time you have RIGHT NOW, 'cause hey....you could die tomorrow.
Someone in the world will not wake up tomorrow morning, but don't mourn their deaths, it was always going to happen, it was just a surprise to you, right? You're not sad when you get surprised on your birhtday, right? So don't mourn saying they should have lived more, or you should have told them how you really felt.
I have an idea, tell them today, live today, never regret today.
How's that for a twist ending?
Falling behind, like I always do!
School: I got an e-mail from my German instructor saying my last day to withdraw from the course was last saturday. I got it too late and I can't now, but the reason he was suggesting it was because I currently have 50% in the class.
Oh God!
I am as usual not doing well in school. I never have ben much f an education keener, but I am actually putting in effort now, and it jsut knida sucks that I'm not doing well. My effort going in in pratically 100 fold in amount, because I have never worked in school and now I am!
I am also reading an entire book tonight and writing a report on it. The report is due tomorrow, and clearly have not learned from my previous mistakes....I'm just faster at reading now!
I don't mind that tonight I have to stay in and completly cut myself off from the world for at least 5 hours to write my report, because in my heart of heart I know I should get used to it. I'm not going to change, and I'm sure I will have many, many more nights of cramming and last minute writing!
I haven't been to my psychology or biology classes in a while and I went on Monday. There were about 40 (from the origianal 80) in my Psychology, and 12 ( from 25) in my Biology Class. I actually felt like a better student for going! LOL
Work: I don't have a job....need I say more? Well I just might! I have applyed for jobs and tomorrow I'll be following them up, so I guess it's not all as bad as I think.
Friends: Still good surprisingly! At laest I think their all good. What witht the school part not going....I really lose track of them all. I think I might have a party at some point, brng them all back around. Play some movies, have some music, could be good?
Family: Always good, I can always fall back on them! It's strange how close knit we are, wehn some people don't even talk to their cousins or know them? They really are all cool, and I realize they can be scary to new comers, but I just love them! They are intense, but oh so amusing
Lovelife: What lovelife? Although I think that is of my own doing.
Oh God!
I am as usual not doing well in school. I never have ben much f an education keener, but I am actually putting in effort now, and it jsut knida sucks that I'm not doing well. My effort going in in pratically 100 fold in amount, because I have never worked in school and now I am!
I am also reading an entire book tonight and writing a report on it. The report is due tomorrow, and clearly have not learned from my previous mistakes....I'm just faster at reading now!
I don't mind that tonight I have to stay in and completly cut myself off from the world for at least 5 hours to write my report, because in my heart of heart I know I should get used to it. I'm not going to change, and I'm sure I will have many, many more nights of cramming and last minute writing!
I haven't been to my psychology or biology classes in a while and I went on Monday. There were about 40 (from the origianal 80) in my Psychology, and 12 ( from 25) in my Biology Class. I actually felt like a better student for going! LOL
Work: I don't have a job....need I say more? Well I just might! I have applyed for jobs and tomorrow I'll be following them up, so I guess it's not all as bad as I think.
Friends: Still good surprisingly! At laest I think their all good. What witht the school part not going....I really lose track of them all. I think I might have a party at some point, brng them all back around. Play some movies, have some music, could be good?
Family: Always good, I can always fall back on them! It's strange how close knit we are, wehn some people don't even talk to their cousins or know them? They really are all cool, and I realize they can be scary to new comers, but I just love them! They are intense, but oh so amusing
Lovelife: What lovelife? Although I think that is of my own doing.
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